CABB 5- An Adamiffic Top Ten and an Interview with Adam by Yva

“Humor is mankind's greatest blessing.”
~ Mark Twain

Hi all,

Welcome to CABB 5! As many of your probably know, sometime ago we took a vote on the JABB YahooGroup and decided we wanted to keep CABB going. So we opted to do a yearly memorial for Mr. Rocket on his birthday, the first of which you can find at CABB 3. But we also wanted to continue to celebrate Adam since he's a very humorous and captivating character. So every so often we'll write a (hopefully) amusing CABB. We hope you enjoy this one!

Big thanks to Yvette for contributing an interview with Adam. For those of you who are new and/or not on the YahooGroup, Yva is Yvette's Dyeland alter ego. Like how Lady JenniAnn is mine.

I'd also like to thank the JABB YahooGroup who is a continuous inspiration as I contribute to both CABBs and JABBs. I'd like to thank all of those people who participated in the survey in JABB 218. If you still want to respond, please do!

Finally, to Charles Rocket with out whom we wouldn't have Adam.

God bless and enjoy,
Jenni

Top Ten Ways TBAA Woulda Been Different with More Adam

10. "The Homecoming: Part 2" woulda come to a screeching halt when an indignant Adam crashes the Greene family's Thanksgiving dinner and gives them all that famous Ben Franklin and the turkey lecture.

9. "The Homecoming: Part 1" woulda changed also. Made uneasy by Monica's strapless dress in "Fallen Angela," poor Adam woulda fainted upon seeing her prostitute garb at the start of that episode.

8. The first few episodes after "The Sign of the Dove" woulda featured Andrew doing Adam's laundry to make up for his bratty behavior in that episode.

7. There woulda been a lot more show tunes, not just two bars from "Sunrise, Sunset."

6. One episode woulda followed Adam as he petitioned the Father to let Alexander appear during his revelation scenes as opposed to the usual dove.

5. Andrew and Adam woulda ended up locked in a contest to see who had the most awesome hair. Assignments woulda been made to cast a vote before going Home with them.

4. Adam and Alexander woulda joined Andrew while he walked the dogs in "Venice." May be then the episode woulda actually been good.

3. Never one to mince words, Adam woulda told Tess to chill out when she went off on Andrew in "The Violin Lesson," "Feather on the Breath of God," and others. Adam woulda then taken his buddy out for ginger ale and orange juice and some actual support.

2. Tired of their getting left outta the Monica-Tess bond and missing his time in trees (a la "Cassie's Choice), Adam woulda built a tree house and invited only Andrew and Henry to it. This woulda inspired a spin-off aptly titled "Dear God, There are Three AODs Living in My Tree and They are HOT."

1. With another singing angel on board, TBAA woulda felt comfortable filming a musical episode a la "Buffy" or "Scrubs." Highlights would be the AODs and caseworkers facing off a la the Jets and Sharks, Tess jumping onto the caddy and singing her own rendition of "Greased Lightning," and Adam and Andrew singing the show's anthem. Sample lyrics below:
"To dream the impossible dream/
of equal screen time not less/
To no longer bear nagging from Tess/
To have fangirls cry over our distress."
(Apologies to Mitch Leigh and Joe Darion who wrote "Man of La Mancha")

An Interview With Adam

Conducted by: Yva J.

First of all, it's a dark and stormy night…whoops, wrong setting, let's try something a little different. It's a warm and comfortable night. Yeah, that's better. I have somehow managed to coerce Adam to come here, sit down with me, and chat about life, death and cocktail wieners! Nice of him, I'd say, but now I shall progress with this interview. Pull up a chair, grab your favorite beverage and let us begin.

Every interviewer has a special means to bring the interviewee to the table, and this is an accomplishment with 20 oranges, a presser, and a glass. Once I have handed Adam a glass of his favorite freshly squeezed orange juice, he gave me a winning smile, and I sat down with a pad of paper and pen in hand and we began.

Yva: Adam, as you know, I no longer work for a newspaper, and anything said here will only be posted to the John/Andrew Bucket Brigade and possibly be seen by about 50 or so fans. Is that OK?

Adam: Of course, that's perfectly fine. I would have come here anyway, just for the orange juice.

Yva: Cute, but at any rate, as you know, I am the founder of the 'Advocacy of Adam Appreciation', have you anything to say to the JABBers reading this?

Adam: Well aside from thanks for the support, I can't think of anything off hand to say. I'm touched.

Yva: OK, this interview is being conducted because Lady JenniAnn had gone out for a manicure or something or other. So, I have to say that I really appreciate you taking a small break from your duties to talk to me this evening.

Adam: My pleasure, Yva.

Yva: So, where have you been lately? You have spent the last month in Dyeland, but you have been rather quiet about what you are doing between planning parties and meeting with your friends for pool or games of Twister and Jenga. What is a typical day like for you, Adam?

Adam: Oh I don’t know, I get up, check the turkeys, make sure they haven’t gotten into things that they aren’t supposed to have gotten into. I sometimes meet Andrew and we talk over breakfast and orange juice. Then we head off to our perspective assignments and then we return to Dyeland when time permits. It’s not as exciting as it might sound.

Yva: (abruptly roused from daydreaming) It does sound interesting, but Adam the question that is ravaging the minds of all Adamdroolers is simple. How do you feel about being called ‘Luscious’?`

Adam: Well, as an angel, lying is out of the question, so, the only thing left for me to do is to plead the fifth.

Yva: That's as close to a ‘I don’t like it’ response as we are going to get. You know that, don’t you, Adam?

Adam: I sometimes forget that you studied Political Science, Yva, and that as a political scientist; you have the ability to twist words.

Yva: <growing indignant> Hey, what is that supposed to mean? I studied Political Science, but the only thing that did was leave me skeptical when it comes to politics. If I wanted to twist words, I'd have become a lawyer. The truth is, I'm just looking for the facts so I can give you a hard time.

Adam: Is that so? ~

Yva: Yeah, and besides, this isn't about me, Adam. This is about your feelings about being called ‘Luscious’ by Lady JenniAnn, and sometimes by me, as well as other Dyelanders. So out with it, cutie pie, how does it really make you feel?

Adam: It doesn’t affect me all that much. Except the redness in the face, the sweating palms, and the chuckles that emerge from Andrew, it is just another day in Dyeland, as far as I can see.

Yva: OK, how about another line of questioning. You have met quite a few Dyeland inhabitants, and after having done so, would you say that there is one or two that are more stubborn than Tess?

Adam: Is this a trick question?

Yva: No.

Adam: Did Andrew put you up to asking this question to get me in trouble with Tess?

Yva: No, Adam, and besides, do you really need Andrew or one of us to get yourself into trouble with Tess? You seem to be doing quite well with it without any of our input.

Adam: OK, fine, there is really no one that I know of who is more stubborn than Tess. Please don't tell her I said that, I could really get into trouble for that one, especially if she were to find out about this interview.

Yva: Are you saying that you are afraid of Tess?

Adam: No, but I would prefer to not get on her bad side, especially right now, when I have so much job related stress that I could write a book about it.

Yva: 'The Angel of Death's Guide to Stress Reduction'. Yep, sounds like a winner to me.

Adam: Very funny, Yva.

Yva: I have my moments.

Adam: That doesn't surprise me.

Yva: It shouldn't, you know me. You also know that I have always given myself the chance to annoy and give Andrew a hard time as of late, and it is about as much fun as giving you a hard time. I guess I could write a book about that topic alone one day. But, seriously Adam let me ask you one last question before we wrap this up.

Adam: OK.

Yva: What is it about you guys that makes you so much fun to tease and poke fun with?

Adam: I have absolutely no idea, but when I asked the Father that question, He said, ‘No comment’. I guess the answer to that question is ‘God only knows’.

Yva: OK, well, thank you, Adam for taking the time to talk with me, and on behalf of JABBers everywhere, you totally rock. I personally love ya and think you're absolutely awesome, but of course you probably already know what I think.

Adam: You're awesome too; a bit mischievous, but I love you, too.

I got up from my side of the table at that moment and gave Adam the biggest hug I could manage. Once he disappeared, I smiled as I looked over and saw that he had drained the orange juice from the glass I had given him. I went over and picked it up and set it in the sink. All the while I was smiling…this has definitely been fun!!!

JABB 219
JABB TOC

(Photo Credits: The photographs used on this page are from "Touched by an Angel" and owned by CBS Productions, Caroline Productions, and Moon Water Productions. They are not being used to seek profit.)